English 220: The Seductive HalluciNATION
On this humble page you will find the various and sundry laws of our splendid estate--the little gates, cages, locks, handcuffs; the meager statutes, ordinances, edicts, and principles that allow our exotic and experimental collective to prosper! Let me underscore that you have absolute intellectual freedom in our province, but to receive that right you must also succumb to the reasonable responsibilities outlined in this, our passport. After all, we want to have a blast, be the best literature class on the West Coast even! But to do that, we need some peace and quiet--to forge our imaginative madness, to amp our lucid hallucinations. So, then, when you walk into AL 201, also known as the SEDUCTIVEamphitheatre, these are some of the ground rules:
Law 1.117 Alpha-B-ninerREAD_READ_READ:
You will have finished the reading that appears on the day to day class calendar! Coming to a literature class without doing the reading is like a gardener trying to raise roses without s***, a surgeon trying to operate without a scalpel, a fireman without an ax, a streetwalker without, er, well, I better stop there. Do the readings. Do them twice if you can MAKE the time!
Law 1.2389 Beta-Tango67PCkaput:
Your laptop will be asleep IN YOUR BAGS during class. Have you noticed how anytime a student uses a laptop in an auditorium there is a "cone of distraction" alongside and behind the student using a computer? This is usually due to said student surfing the web via wi-fi perusing erotic delights or god knows what (typical myspace snapshot example opposite).
Law 1.311893 Zed-BogieViperCell:
Law 1.499556 Charlie-Delta_Thief:
is for cads, thieves, and idiots who desire an "F" for the class.
When you walk into class each day on time you will do so having completed your reading assignment for that day. Please think twice about joining us if you have not finished the readings--the quality of our class depends upon your dedicated work and your relentless and independent curiosity. Without your periodic intellectual donations, the class is likely to evolve into a boring, even painful waste of time. With your help, we can avoid this as well as scenes like those depicted here:
WRITING AND EXAMINATIONS
QUIZZES AND ATTENDANCE
There will also be a couple of in-class Panic-Inducing Challenges otherwise known as "check that you did the reading carefully and on time quizzes." You can expect these miserable quizzes from time to time, the number of quizzes depending on how many of you are nostalgic for high school. In other words, if everyone acts like a talented university undergraduate, we will enjoy FEW if any quizzes during our lights, ink body-drenched semester. The whole point of this class is to work together, the idea being that we convert our boring, somewhat high-tech classroom into a chaotic, unpredictable and exciting intellectual laboratory. Missing class, you miss as well the whole point of the adventure. So please bypass no more than three classes--and no more than ONE of your breakout sections. Miss MORE than three classes during the term and your grade will decay in an ugly way: examples: your hard-earned A- will morph into a B-; your "gentleman's C" will appear on gradeline as a "D." Ditching this class too often will be as fun as a case of the flesh-eating virus.
Why 'office hours'? I expect you to visit me in office hours at least once during the semester. At SDSU, it's easy to fall through the cracks, to feel that you are nothing but a number or some warm pile of sentient flesh filling a seat. In order to underscore that the person teaching you is somewhat human, please make a point to take the time to introduce yourself in person. My office hours will be on Mondays from to 1 to around 4 or so in Arts and Letters 273. If these hours are inconvenient, do not hesitate to call me at 594.1524 either to schedule an appointment or discuss your questions via telephone. My E-mail address is: firstname.lastname@example.org.